So, I was reading a post on a particular discussion board that I follow, and came across a young woman who was going through a really tough break up with her boyfriend. And for some reason it really hit me hard. I could feel her pain, and with that brought about my own past feelings of heartache from over the past bazillion years. And I began to wonder if we ever really "get over" those that we gave a piece of ourselves to. The moments shared, no matter how brief, shape us in ways that can't always be defined. We'll never know any differently, because what's done is done and there's no turning back. Other than a frontal lobotomy, it's impossible to forget the ones that came before where we are today.
No, I'm not pining away for you. Or you. And definitely not you. Please don't get it twisted. But I do find there are times when I wonder...the occasional "what if". And with that comes the visions of how different my life would be. Knowing full well that it would not necessarily mean better. Or worse. Just different. Because when I loved you, I loved you with all my heart. And even when it wasn't love in the truest sense, I still gave you the best of me in that short moment of time. That's just the way I've always been. Even when I want to hold back, I give my all. No regrets. But lots of tears.
And then I moved on. Eventually. Some took longer than others. But moving on is inevitable. Until right now. Just for this second.
And now...for the video....
Has someone taken your faith?
It's real, the pain you feel
The life, the love
You'd die to heal
The hope that starts
The broken hearts
You trust, you must confess
Is someone getting the best
The best, the best, the best of you?
My favorite Foo song. :-)
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